Alone

Alone

Dear Fatima,

I’m 15 years old female and my parents have decided to move to a new house, I know this is going to sound really stupid but I actually was sad when I heard this. My problem Fatima, is that I already feel alone as is,  and this home that I live in now is great, so I feel like I’m going to be already more alone than ever because my room was my sanctuary, and now that Im moving I feel like I don’t have anywhere to turn to sorry, this is rlly stupid but I just needed advice because I’ve been feeling like this for a while. How do I overcome my aloneness I guess and how do I stop being attached to things like this?

Sincerly,

Forever Alone

Assalamu ‘ alaykum, 

It’s perfectly normal to feel sad when you think about moving. Leaving a place always has some sadness associated with it, especially since it has been a safe haven for you.
You might consider sitting in the middle of your room and filling a box or a journal with some of the most important memories you have in that room. You could even take pictures of it to look back on.
You might also think about what makes your room special and figure out ways to recreate what made it a safe space in your new room. 
Moving from one place to another is also filled with new possibilities.
Perhaps the new place need not be one in which you are alone.
While you are sitting in your room thinking about what made it special, you may also think about: What are the things you would want to give yourself permission to do differently? 
Perhaps you will choose to get involved in a club or cause that you always wanted to be a part of but were too nervous to join. Perhaps you will pick up a new hobby that will bring more joy into your life.
The possibilities are out there and up to you to find.
Sincerely,
Your sister in Islam,
“Fatima Z”

2 thoughts on “Alone”

  1. Anonymous

    Hi Sweetheart,
    Your belongings are what made it your sanctuary…insha Allah your new home will bring you even more peace and serenity. When I was a teenager, I used to stay locked up in my room ALL the time…everyone used to get so annoyed with me. But I loved the silence, the peace, the perfect lighting, the comfort of my things, the music….I got married and had to drastically lose that private space. So if anything, moving into a new place is good practice for upcoming changes in the future. Embrace the change with love…its still you, its still your space…being alone is honestly so lovely- whether its in your old place or new. Let us know how you do once you’ve moved!

    Best Wishes

  2. HA18

    Salaam sweetheart. Just wanted to let you know what you’re feeling is not stupid at all. My room in my old house, even my old cubicle at work, have sentimental value to me. When I had to change from those places I felt sad that I would be leaving them. I took pictures and every time I see those pictures I think of the memories I had there.

    For me, those places were important to me in terms of my growth and becoming who I am.

    Now I see that I am making these new places also important to me and I have learned to love them too, but in a different way and for different reasons.

    Change can be scary, but with the right attitude you can also make your new room a place you love.